This quote perfectly sums up the reason Sam and I moved back to the small college town where we met. We needed space to establish our new family, to build a community with our lifelong friends, and to immerse ourselves in the church that is becoming our home. The transition isn’t always easy, but it is more than worth it.
The wedding dust has settled, (most of) the boxes have been unpacked, and our first house is really starting to feel like a home. The only problem is that I’m still recovering from all of the planning/moving/marrying craziness that I’ve been avoiding the final touches. We decided not to paint the walls before we moved in because it was too much of a hassle, but I knew that I didn’t want to leave the walls blank. We have plenty of photographs and art prints to hang so now I just need to decide how I want to display them. I love a good gallery wall, but I can’t decide which style I like best. Should we do a uniform color/size frame or a mix? Should we hang the photos with washi tape or small push pins so that we can switch them around frequently? And where should we hang them?
Do any of you have a gallery wall? How did you hang the pieces and where did you put it?
Although I graduated in December, my actual commencement ceremony is Mother’s Day weekend. That’s only twelve days from now. And I just realized that I haven’t even thought about what I’m going to wear. I went to school in New Orleans so I already know that it will be blazing hot and humid. Therefore, I need a lightweight dress. Graduation is held in the Superdome (where the Saints play) so I also need comfortable, easy-to-walk in shoes. I also want a dress that I can wear again throughout the Spring and Summer. I decided to check ASOS because I know their prices are good and they have a huge inventory. It took me at least an hour to go through all of the dresses and I still don’t think I saw everything. Here are the top 10 dresses on my wishlist. Help me narrow it down! And if you’re graduating this Summer, let me know what you’ve decided to wear.
I got a rejection letter yesterday. It was from a prestigious law firm that I applied to a few weeks ago. The letter was all of two lines and addressed me as “Mr.” For a split second I was sad about it (and slightly angry at my parents for giving me a unisex name), but then I felt a huge wave of relief. It’s no secret that I have no desire to be a lawyer. I’m just happy that I graduated from law school. Everything inside of me knows that the legal profession is not where I’m called to be, but I still find myself taking steps toward it. I’m not sure if it’s pressure from family and friends or pressure I put on myself (probably both), but I feel obligated to follow through with it sometimes. And each and every time I try to follow through, it doesn’t feel right and ultimately something stops me. How long is it going to take me to realize that I’m swimming in the wrong direction?
I have big dreams for this blog and for my writing. So big and exciting, in fact, that I find myself ignoring them. I’ve even been ignoring the blog because, when I sit down to write, those dreams taunt me. I know that I could be doing so much more, but I’m afraid. Those dreams are too scary, too risky, too expensive, the list goes on. But what if those dreams were planted in me by God? (they were.) What if He already has a plan mapped out? (He does.) What exactly am I waiting for?
Over the next few months, I’m really challenging myself to step out on faith, dive into deeper waters than I’ve ever been in, and trust that God (and my sweet husband) will help me figure this out. I’m also challenging myself to be diligent and to work hard. My brain has been out of “school mode” for almost a year now and I’ve found that it’s difficult for me to set goals and work towards them for myself. I’m so used to answering to professors and working hard for grades and a degree. Now it’s time to answer to, and work hard for, myself.
The thing about being a writer (or a painter, designer, etc.), is that when you first start out, there’s no one there giving you assignments or offering you payment for services they haven’t yet seen. It’s just you and your computer (or pencils or paint or sewing machine). You have to show up everyday and wait for the inspiration to strike, for the words to come, and for something to take shape. You have to start and restart, type and erase, try and try again. It’s a process without a definite end result. It’s hard and beautiful and honest and crazy. And it’s important. It’s important for me and it’s important for the people who will one day read my words.
So I’ve made up my mind: I’m diving all the way into these dreams and I’m not turning around no matter how frightening they may be. I’m excited to look back on this post a year, three years and five years down the road. I know that I will have grown as a woman and in my faith. I know that I will be writing for so many more women and that this space will have become a community. And I know that I will be more than happy with my decision.
Thank you in advance for taking this journey with me!
Today, I’m giving myself permission to be myself. I’m giving myself permission to love myself, despite my imperfections. I’m giving myself permission to believe that God created me in His perfect image, that He loves me despite my sins and that He trusts me to carry out the calling He placed on my life (after all, it was his idea in the first place). I’m giving myself permission to trust my husband when he says that he believes in me and supports me in every single thing that I do. I’m giving myself permission to dream bigger than I have ever dreamed. I’m giving myself permission to keep dreaming, even when it doesn’t bring me financial security or recognition or even peace. I’m giving myself permission to block out the pressure to do what “makes sense.” I’m giving myself permission to do the things that seem to make no sense at all.
Today and forever, I give myself permission to be myself. To love myself. To trust myself.